Category Archives: guilt

Darwin Von Doodlebug IV

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Social media has it’s good points and bad points!  The bad being, what ends up on social media – STAYS on social media, especially pictures!  Facebook can be like a therapy session that the rest of you have to ‘listen’ to but it can also be like a picture diary.  With the events of this past week, I keep telling myself to stay off Facebook but like a train wreck, my ADD brings me back time and time again, looking back, like a movie of the past year at pictures or posts – torturing myself, not knowing why I keep doing it.

On Fridays, the ‘grandkids’ come over if Tracy has to work to have some puppy play time.  Delilah loves when Darwin comes over because he puts up with her ‘play’.  After Oscar came home, we had gone out to get something to eat and when we came back, my son , Ryan, told us that Darwin had thrown up! Hmm, not that unusual! With a total of 8 animals in the household at one time or another, any one of them could be spewing something. It wasn’t even an after thought, it was time to feed the dogs! Four dogs, four bowls, four places!  I ran out to the store and when I got back, my husband told me that Darwin had thrown up 2 more times! Within about 4 – 5 hours he threw up a total of 4 times.  Looking back now, he went from his jumpy, playful perky self to an ‘I don’t feel so good Mommy!’ little boy!  We called Brandon to let him know and he ended up being up with him all night (he is such a good doggy daddy)!

Saturday morning, the vet managed to squeezed him in, gave him a quick once over, x-rays, a few shots for the nausea and sub Q fluids and sent him home with some anti nausea medicine.   Darwin seemed to be a little better throughout the day but still not his barking at every squirrel, no depth perception/bumps into everything, so excited to see you self.  Brandon kept in contact with the vet by email/phone throughout the weekend and on Sunday, they both decided he probably needed to go back in Monday morning; but that if he got any worse, he should go to the emergency vet but expect them to opt for emergency surgery (which wouldn’t have been a surprise).  Darwin managed to keep some food down and was still drinking but wasn’t getting any better!

Monday morning back to the vet, more exams, blood work, xrays, barium series this time and, low and behold…an obstruction.  The dye never left his stomach and seemed to be getting absorbed by something.  Surgery it would be!  His vitals weren’t that great so the vet decided that they would get his numbers up and do the surgery Tuesday morning.   The surgery was successful, he had two blockages.  They found some stringy stuff and some plastic stuff (possibly a nylon bone).  They showed it to Brandon, I don’t know all the details on exactly what it was but, YAY, it was out and Darwin would be on the road to recover!  He stayed at the vet all day Tuesday and Brandon was able to pick him up on Wednesday after 2 pm.  Oscar and I went over to see Darwin that evening and so Oscar could help Brandon cut a counter top.  I sat and cuddled with Darwin (& Dixie).  He was doing good, normal after surgery grogginess but still gently hopping off the couch, wagging his tail when he saw Papa and then back on the couch for cuddles with Nana!  Sicky little boy, I will just cuddle you and it will be all better very soon! ❤

Thursday morning Brandon says that Darwin had a bad night, couldn’t get comfortable, was very restless and flopping in bed.  He wasn’t able to keep his medicine down and hadn’t really had anything to eat although he was drinking water.  Around 6 am, he had gone out and pooped ‘a little nugget’ but by around 7 am he was projectile vomiting all over the place, whining and shaking in pain.   Tracy called the vet and rushed him back in so they could administer the medicines by shot or IV and see what else was going on.

I’ll make the rest of this quick, because that’s how it went…by around 11:30 am they were rushing him back into surgery, by around 1:30…he was gone!  Apparently, the part of the intestine after the blockage gets weak from the lack of blood flow or fluids and ruptured.  Our beloved, 2nd foster failure, bull in a china shop, has to lean against you even when he walks, licks you CONSTANTLY, rests his head on your knee/leg/arm while you’re eating was gone.  As I type this, I still can’t believe it, how fast it all happened or that it happened at all.

There aren’t too many dogs that I look at that I don’t think are cute, I pretty much love them all but Darwin had THE most gorgeous face around and he always melted your heart when he looked at you with that heart shaped nose.  I just couldn’t help but smooch his face, even when he was in trouble or getting on my nerves!

I completely forgot that this was his full name until I started writing this (some how the boys in our house got LONG names)!  Social media therapy also allows one to write down their thoughts, removing them from a persons head, releasing just a little hurt, although any animal lover  knows, not all of it and not forever!

Here’s to you – Darwin Von Doodlebug IV!   Your life was SO short, we had you for just one year but the imprint you have left us with will last us a lifetime!

RIP my gorgeous Tin Man

08/??/12 – 11/14/13

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1057813_10200495243445998_1821293056_n  DARWIN DIXIE

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WANTED: Thunder Buddies

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Well, Duke WAS excited about spring until the clouds rolled in, the drops started falling and the thunder started booming!

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Our beds aren’t high enough for him, he tried two of them. After unsuccessfully trying to get into my sons bedroom to attempt yet another bed, he navigated to a bathroom where I’m sure he would have gotten in the tub if not for Amanda needing to shower for work! Albeit slowly, I managed to get him to walk out of the bathroom on his own!

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Finally settling on a nose in the corner spot under my desk, he relaxed enough to at least stop panting! It was probably the worst he has gotten in awhile! 😦

Any other grey shirt wearing puppies out there?

Any tips on how to make your Thunder Buddy more comfortable until the storm blows over?!

Taking a break

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On Monday, my husband and I will be boarding a plane to take a trip that we both have wanted to take for some time. The kids are grown, tuitions are paid and, thanks to the economy, vacations are cheaper than ever. This gives us the opportunity to travel out of the USA and to a country other than Mexico or Canada! For 8 days, we will be enjoying pubs, castles and, what I am dreaming are the most beautiful views you can imagine!


For as much enjoyment, relaxation and excitement this vacation will bring, it also brings a tinge of sadness and a bit of guilt! As we take off to a far off land, 7 animals, not including fish or chickens, will wander through my house and wonder what happened to their routine! OK, 4 of those animals are cats and are probably not even going to notice we’re gone unless the food bowl empties before it can be refilled! Dogs, on the other hand, are creatures of habit! I’m reminded of that any morning I try to NOT take Duke for a walk! The mere mention of the word sends him into a tail wagging frenzy toward the front door! (Who says dogs don’t understand English?)


Sure, I have 2 legged children old enough to ‘take care’ of the 4 legged children and, deep down, I know they will do a fine job! Still, all I see in those eyes are the words ‘Please don’t leave us!’. As they lay quietly on the couch, I wonder if they are dreaming of chasing after us on our way out the door as their paws twitch and their muffled barks barely squeak out!

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While away, I will wake up each day missing the morning walk I DON’T have to take and wonder how much they are missing me, knowing they are still sleeping tucked warmly in their beds; more than likely not even realizing the time we will be away! I’m sure I will miss them more than they miss me!

SO, although I am extremely excited to take this trip, I am just as excited to return home because there is just no better welcome home as one that is given by a dog, or two, or three!!!!